Grief is weighing down my heart yet again this week. Our company is reducing jobs, and the heaviness of losing friend after friend at work drains the bit of energy that I still had. All these people who have added so much value to our work and our lives now need to start over. Monday evening, I got home from work and just felt like I had very little left. No more energy, no more creativity, no more encouraging words for anybody.
This year has held lots of joy and pain. Today, I am feeling the pain on behalf of my friends. We are studying Psalm 42 in my bible study this week, and the words feel right for 2020:
“Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me?” Today it is grief for my friends who were affected by the downsizing. For all the changes in the world right now, all the uncertainty, all the division.
“Deep calls to deep in the roar of your waterfalls; All your waves and breakers have swept over me.”
Psalm 42:7
In 1 Kings 19, Elijah tells God in despair, “I have had enough, LORD.” He falls asleep, and he is awakened by an angel of the Lord saying, “Get up and eat.” After he eats and falls asleep again, the angel of the Lord wakes him up again. “Get up and eat, for the journey is too much for you.”
This passage gave me some measure of joy this morning. You don’t need to be amazing today – just do something simple. Get up and eat. Lean on the one who provides all you need.
“By day the Lord directs his love, at night his song is with me – a prayer to the God of my life.”
Psalm 42:8